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The Essence of Enlightened Seduction


Every true lover knows that the secret to his power over women lies in the power they have over him. He is a friend to women. He is delighted by the way they flow through life and the way they occupy the world. Their essence enamors and enchants him, and in return he can't help but celebrate them.

He is a romantic; he believes in love, and his love is complete, absolute. He is a slave to his love of women. There is no room for misogyny, no hint of presumption, no toxicity of manipulation.

He knows that women can sense immediately when they are in the presence of a man who loves women, who thinks they are beautiful, who makes them feel lovely, who delights in them. He genuinely loves women, and a man that loves women is loved by women.

He feels no need to validate himself to other men by bragging about his exploits. He never kisses and tells... ever. His encounters with women are never about bolstering his own self-esteem or adding another notch to his bedpost. It is all about respect.

It is never about taking something for himself, but always about sharing something with her.

For he knows that all experiences in life are amplified once they are shared.

His biggest fear is to be perceived as just another man; he is not like other men, nor does he aspire to be.

If he thought for a moment that she regretted her encounter with him in any way, or somehow felt sad or hurt because of him, it would break his heart. He can't bear the thought that a woman would ever feel she was manipulated by him.

And yet he doesn't mask his desires as a man. He never portrays indifference or apathy in an attempt to sneak under the radar. Instead he embraces his sexuality, presents it to her without presumption, is delighted if she responds favorably but deeply respectful if she does not.

He enters every one of his romantic adventures with newness and excitement, like his first love all over again. He knows that the impact he makes on her, and that she makes on him, will resonate with both of them for years.

And will he be hurt? Will he feel the pangs of loss when it ends? Of course. But he loves it all just the same.

Honesty is the greatest aphrodisiac...

He lives his life believing that every interaction in life is, in essence, a seduction. And so he assumes a woman is always interested. It might be a false assumption, of course, but it is a pleasant assumption, and so it is the way he has chosen to live his life.

He never defends himself when accused of being a player. He knows the truth: that he never plays with a woman's emotions. He is at peace with himself.

And so he makes no attempt at apology or justification for the way he is; he desires neither empathy nor absolution, nor even, for that matter, understanding. He has no need to defend himself because women are his greatest defenders.

Instead he believes his intentions are pure and mutually desired. He is genuine and honest, maybe the most honest man she has ever met. And women have demonstrated over and over to him that honesty is the greatest aphrodisiac.

And to him, they are all his girls. Every woman is his woman. He has immense compassion for women. He sees their sadness and their loss, their faded dreams, their dead and dying relationships, their stultifying careers and responsibilities, and he makes it his mission to impart beauty to their life again.

Yes, he has been created by women, formed by them, and inspired by them.

He shares in their secrets...


Copyright 2002 Alabaster Communications Inc

"... The manifesto of a lover. It is crystallized and fine, honest and smooth like a polished diamond..." -- Idan Cohen

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"Being a musician, I have over the years heard a few musical performances that I consider to be life enhancing, almost life changing, in their profundity and depth of soul....

I can without a doubt rank Zan as having the exact same effect on me as that of listening to these giants of the music world that I have been fortunate enough to hear...

In fact, the very first thing I noticed upon entering the seminar room was the fact that there were four very lovely looking ladies sitting in the front row. This was refreshing. It was also fascinating to see these women taking notes, with a look of intense interest in everything Zan was saying...

Zan often said that he needed women in the room in order to really be inspired. And inspired, he was. It was clear that he was calibrating his words to their reactions, not in the sense that he was looking for their approval, but in the sense that he was creating a connection with them, as he explained his thoughts on the nature of seduction, relationships, love etc...

It truly was like watching a great violinist communing with the other members of a string quartet, instead of standing there trying to be the center of attention...."

RB, Montreal
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